I’m meant to be working…but I felt like writing something.
Once again, i’m starting this today without knowing what i’m going to write. So whatever jumps into my head first, is going to be what I write about!
I have said before that, like everyone in the world I imagine, There are some things which I have kept to myself and myself only. Truths and feelings that only I know. I often contemplate whether or not I will ever voice these things – be them the small hidden ideas or something huge and possibly life-changing. Today I’ve been thinking about some of these things again.
Well, the truth is I think about these things every day. Many are rather melancholic, but anyone who read my last post (see here, https://thoughtofvg.wordpress.com/2014/11/16/full-circle/) will know that I feel I gain a lot from melancholy. It’s hard to explain why, but that’s just the case. I might talk about that later, or perhaps on another day.
I won’t say what these things are that I’ve always kept to myself in this blog. In fact, I think the only reason i’m writing about (or rather around) it is that for some reason listening to this song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQmK6nN7bBU made me think it would be a good idea. The title has a mysterious hopefulness about it.
I’m fully aware i’m rambling. But i’ve decided that I’m allowed to ramble on this blog. I’ll keep concise writing to essays and the like…after all, one of the blogs that affected me the most in the past was simply someone who rambled about everything she could think of, with an unrivaled honesty and intensity. I was often in tears after reading those posts, even on the happier writings, simply because of the intensity of the words.
That leads on nicely onto why I love melancholy so much, despite it seeming completely unreasonable. Melancholy is so much more intense than any other emotion. Maybe it isn’t for everyone. Maybe I use the word melancholy in a different way to the average person. Maybe some people just don’t feel as much.
So here’s a test. I want you to listen to some of this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QOd2x1xxwRE
This, in my eyes is melancholy.
It’s beautiful, yet ugly.
It’s calm, yet violent.
It’s sound, but somehow it has colour.
It’s gloriously ‘happy’ yet painfully ‘sad’.
I guess that’s why the band calls itself ‘this will destroy you’ – because there is so much conflict in the music, but because of that conflict it seems to work so much better at evoking an emotion.
Just look at some of the comments-